25.5.06
Bad Dream
I'm starting to think that bad dreams really do portend an unhappy future.

For the last few nights I have had very strange, vivid dreams. They have all involved many people from school in school settings. Last night was no exception. It started with baccalaureate, but it wasn't in our chapel; it was in another sanctuary. Some people carried long poles up to Dr. Murphy. I saw one on the ground so I picked it up and gave it to him. He yelled at me because that pole was supposed to stay there and I had messed everything up. Fast forward to the second part of the dream. I was outside in what looked like the fall (colder, many dead leaves) with many classmates. It looked like an end-of-the-year picnic, except for the fact that it was the fall. I felt all alone. I couldn't find any friends that I could sit with. I was crying. And there were hamburgers. Lots of mushy, gross ones.

It was a sad dream, the kind you wake up from with salty trails of dried tears on your cheeks. But I woke up, determined to shake off the dream.

Well, fate had something else in mind for me. We have car issues. I have sibling issues. Thus I am crying and alone. I thought we were adults by now; we're not supposed to fight like this. I thought that this summer would work without me having a car. Wrong on both fronts.

I was offered a job in Japan. But do I want to take it? I was so sure a month ago that if it was offered to me, I would take it. But now I don't know. Thus I am crying and alone. I can't wake up from this bad dream.

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written by Ruthie @ 10:35 AM  
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私について

Name: Ruthie
Home: Japan
About Me: I want to know who God is and what his truth is. I love getting lost in beautiful music and cloudless star-filled skies, especially in the fall. I hate being bored. I like big cities. I want to travel the world.
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