28.2.06
No Time
I hope Dr. Murphy is serious about creating more time for students to meditate and reflect. I just wish it would've come earlier in my college career. I feel like my time is completely taken up by being busy and not doing anything of lasting merit. I don't have deep conversations with people anymore because I simply don't have time. I don't have time to compose. I don't have time to read for fun. I don't have time to really read the Bible and reflect on it. I don't have time to sit and really listen to music-- just listen, not type or check email or do homework while I'm listening to music.

I keep telling myself that next half will be different; next half I drop two classes and only add one writing class that won't be that big of a deal. I'll have time then, won't I?" Oh, but I forget about all the concerts and rehearsals and exams and projects, not to mention the forms I need to fill out for loans, graduation, PI, a job after I graduate, etc. I am swamped all the time and I hate living like this. And this has been my life for four years. No wonder I always have a headache or neckache. No wonder I nervously pick at my face-- I am always on edge. And I'm not even as busy as my roommate or some of my other friends. I can't imagine their stress level.

I type this now when I should be preparing for my final exam tomorrow morning. I have practice in twenty-five minutes, and I suppose I shall be up tonight until at least 1 AM, against my will. Lord knows I would be in bed at 11 if I could. But I felt that I needed to write to release some energy, some of the built-up stress. I find solace in knowing that I have two long days of bus riding ahead of me to rest, think, read, laugh, talk, and let this stress melt off me-- only to start the rigamaroll that is choir tour. Yikes.
written by Ruthie @ 11:27 PM   0 comments
27.2.06
i thank You God for most this amazing day
i thank You God for most this amazing
day: for the leaping greenly spirits of trees
and a blue true dream of sky; and for everything
which is natural which is infinite which is yes

(i who have died am alive again today,
and this is the sun’s birthday; this is the birthday
of life and of love and wings: and of the gay
great happening illimitably earth)

how should tasting touching hearing seeing
breathing any (lifted from the no
of all nothing) human merely being
doubt unimaginable You?

(now the ears of my ears awake and
now the eyes of my eyes are opened)
--e. e. cummings

I love this poem.

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written by Ruthie @ 9:20 PM   0 comments
24.2.06
Back again.
Yes, I was on a hiatus. I had to figure out some things about why I do this blogging thing. I think I agree with Aubrey-- its not just so people will read, but so I can remember. And typing is so much easier than writing by hand. And I wanted a new look. The new name means "Nickname" in Chinese-- literally, "small name." I like it.
written by Ruthie @ 10:44 PM   0 comments
 
私について

Name: Ruthie
Home: Japan
About Me: I want to know who God is and what his truth is. I love getting lost in beautiful music and cloudless star-filled skies, especially in the fall. I hate being bored. I like big cities. I want to travel the world.
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